Are Your Fears Blocking Your Wishes?

Sep 8, 2013   //   by smohan   //   Healthy Mind  //  4 Comments

Sometimes I feel too afraid to wish; sometimes too afraid to say my deepest desires out loud.

What is that about?

My dear friend just booked herself on a 2 week Mediterranean cruise with days notice. Of course, my first thoughts went to how I’d be a bit upset if I were her husband, who will have to arrange or take care of two toddlers while working.

She didn’t see it that way.

She didn’t allow herself to feel anything but fully aligned with what she knew in her core was right for her in that moment;

not fear of the money she’d spend, 
not fear of how her kids will handle 2 weeks without mom,
not fear of how her husband would respond,
not fear of anyone else judging her for such a bold move. 


But the bold move wasn’t booking the cruise or leaving town. It was being fully committed to nourishing herself with whatever her spirit called out for so that she can be the best version of herself. This time it happened to be a spiritually based cruise that will allow her the space to gain clarity on some foundational direction shifts in her life, and to raise her vibration. Next time, that may be a digestive cleanse.

It’s not about what you do to meet your needs; It’s about your experience while meeting your needs.

{Tweet, tweet, tweet-a-littly-tweet…}

My pitta-predominant self immediately compared her experience to my own. (This is what is so great about having friends that are living their spiritual path–we help each other expand into our best.)

Dang-it! I could see so clearly how I was shrouded in fear. 

I’ve had Morocco on my vision board for a few years. I always envisioned getting married there on the coast. Two of my dearest friends are leading a yoga and food retreat there. The signs are clear: in my heartspace, it’s a solid yes to Morocco, yes to sharing the experience with my loved ones, and yes to yoga and food!

It’s like the opportunity is standing before me, arms outstretched for a hug. And I’m just peeking at it like a two-year old behind his mother’s leg, not sure if I feel safe enough to embrace it. I realize how I’ve been raised with a base perspective of caution, which is really fear.  I tell my inner child,

Don’t ever apologize for seeking, or being in, your joy. When you are in your greatest joy, you will emanate it to all around you; and that is the greatest thing you can do for anyone.

So, I’m stepping fully into my journey to Morocco. I’m running and jumping into that Universal hug. {woohoo!!}

And guess what? that reduces internal conflict, which means I’m balancing deep-seated vata imbalance in the process-bonus!

I’m marking my calendar, paying my deposit, and getting my bellydance on.  How are you jumping into your joy? I’d love to hear your experience (and have you feel how good it is to proclaim it) in a Comment below!






  • Aloha Siva! Thank you for sharing your wonderful story :) I can relate to this as I have been through a similar dilemma almost a decade ago. I had fear about not having enough money to do what my heart desired (live in the rainforest), but I realized that meeting my soul’s needs meant having a stronger spirit to support all other aspects of my life holistically. I paid the deposit, flew to the rainforest and it changed my life forever. It is so beautiful for me to hear stories about people who just do it. I have a bit of wanderlust and have followed my spirit’s desires (literally) around the world… After my father died, I took the trip he and I have always wanted to take (even though I didn’t have the resources, I knew I needed the healing so I went) on an around-the-world plane ticket and so happy I did. When we put our spirits first, all else falls into place so easily and effortlessly. It’s funny how we forget that fear is an illusion and there is only love. Thank you for sharing! Silly maya… life is for us! hehehe. Much love… xo Tehani

    • Thanks for sharing Tehani–it takes courage to not make decisions based on fear!

  • I hope u have a great trip.
    I agree with your point that we must not over calculate and we should go ahead and do things we want to do.
    I just wanted to add another aspect based on my experiences that makes it easier for me.

    The fact is that things can go wrong even if u have calculated every detail. The point to understand is that u can still be happy and enjoy the experience. I think the problem happens when we build an illusion in our mind of a utopian experience. And since life has so many moving parts some things can go wrong and that causes a fear and the over calculating nature.

    If only we can learn to look at glass half full and give up the perfectionist and utopian attitude
    then we can always enjoy things in any situation and learn from things that dont go right.

    This way we can move towards being “sthitapragya” and our karma will become “nishkaam karma” . And that is moksha. You enjoy every experience and live the best life possible.


    • Agreed! Thanks for sharing Amit.

Leave a comment to smohan



Siva's tips on bringing ayurvedic perspective to every aspect of your life from partying to parenting, preparing food to paying bills, delivered right to your inbox when you need to hear it most!


FEB 5 Ayurvedic Living Workshop
10-3p Lunch & Ayurvedic Starter Kit


Svastha Health Ayurvedic Wellness

1815 Petaluma Ave
Long Beach, CA 90815